Mementoes
by Tijuana Pirate
Summary: A Reffie inspired by the song Long Day by Matchbox 20. Yuffie is getting ready to leave Reno when she discovers a small box hidden in his closet. Inside are all the things that she's ever written him. And that's when Reno walks onto the scene.


Author's note: Wow. I cannot tell you how much this little story has changed from its original conception. It was originally supposed to be a two part fan-fic. I discarded that idea after a little while and decided to write one song fic set to Long Day by Matchbox 20. About two thirds of the way through the fic, I removed all of the song lyrics because I had basically reached the end of the story but there were another ten or so lines. Even when it was set to the music though, it still seemed to take turns that weren't implied by the song. Well, I hope that you enjoy it. It might have been the toughest thing I have ever written. I can't tell you how many hours I wrestled with it trying to make it go one way only to find out that it wanted to go another one.  
. . . Oh, I suppose you *might* want to know what it's about. Well, it's about Yuffie when she finally decides that Reno is just another dead end and what Reno tries to do to make her stay.  
  
Mementoes  
  
Yuffie threw things haphazardly into her suitcase. This had been a long time coming, she thought bitterly. She had tried her very best but you can't keep a relationship alive just by yourself. It had been weeks since Reno had shown any interest, any tenderness. Well, whatever else could be said about Yuffie Kisaragi, she did know how to take a hint. Fine. If Reno didn't want her here, she wouldn't stay. At least, he could have had the decency to tell her though. That would have been nice. A little human decency was probably too much to expect from him though.  
*So this is what it comes down to*, she thought. Four years after Meteor, Yuffie had met up with Reno. She could still remember it. She had turned away from a vendor where she had bought a lemon snow cone. Reno had bumped into her, ruining her cone. She had shouted some indecencies at him and he, laughing, had bought her a new one and one for himself. That had been five months ago. . . *Five months of my life, wasted*, she thought sadly.  
Yuffie decided to search the closet for anything else of hers. She'd be damned if she was going to let him keep any of her stuff. She climbed up on a chair to check the top shelf. There, her fingers brushed a weathered feeling box. She pulled it down and looked inside it.  
"What the. . .?"  
Yuffie sat down on a chair with a thunk, utterly stunned. The box was filled with papers. She picked one of them at random.  
*Reno, we're out of cheese. Pick some up after work. Thanks, Yuffie.*  
That was weird. She tried another and it turned out to be a card.  
*Happy One-Month Anniversary Turkey. X O X O Yuffie. *  
She smiled a little, reading that. At the time, they hadn't had that much money but Reno hadn't given up. He had cooked her a four-course meal, complete with a bushel of roses as a centrepiece. She had just gotten him the card. Intrigued now, she took out some more.  
*Went out. Be back around 10. Yuffie*  
Well, nothing special there. The next was a tiny rough piece of paper.  
*594-8297*  
Yuffie started at the sight of that one. It was the little paper that Yuffie had given Reno when he had asked for her number. It had taken him a week of begging before she had given in.  
"Reno. . . why did you keep all this?"  
She ruffled through all of the papers. There were so many of them. Cards and notes, sticky tabs and letters. Every single thing that she had ever written him was hidden in that little box. She shook her head disbelieving. She could understand the cards but some of them.  
"Tape my show for me Reno. 11:00," she read out loud.  
It didn't make any sense. It didn't really sound like Reno at all. Yeah, Reno could be downright charming when he wanted to be; Yuffie knew that all too well. At the beginning it had been all candlelight dinners and random gifts. Now, she couldn't even talk to him. She would turn to kiss him and he'd shrug away. Yuffie hadn't realized how much that could hurt until now. She didn't care about the stupid dinners or presents but she would give anything for him to just be with her! She wanted to be able to sit with him the way she had before. She wanted to make him laugh. She wanted him to hold her the way he used to. She. . . Yuffie's hands closed on a crumpled piece of paper and froze. She recognized this one. All it had was five words. She remembered them because it was a note that she had never finished.  
*Reno I love you but. . .*  
A week ago, she had been ready to leave him. She had even started her good-bye letter. After the first line though, she had lost heart. She had decided to try a little more but. . . she couldn't even remember what she had done with the letter but somehow Reno had found it and, for some reason she couldn't understand, he had kept it. There was a noise in the doorway and Yuffie jumped up.  
"Reno!" she gasped.  
And there he was, leaning nonchalantly. He almost looked his normal, cocky self but. . . but maybe he was just a little too tense, and maybe his eyes were a little too dull.  
"What's this?" Yuffie asked, grabbing the box.  
"A box."  
"No shit Reno."  
He didn't say anything and Yuffie grew angry.  
"Reno you've kept every single thing that I've ever written you! Why?!"  
He still didn't say anything. Yuffie threw down the box and went up to Reno. She had had enough. She grabbed his shoulders and made him look at her. For a moment, she was successful. He looked at her, straight in the face. Then, to her amazement, he cringed and turned away. Taken aback, she released her grip.  
"Reno, talk to me. Please." He turned his back to her and leaned against the doorframe, head down.  
"What were you going to say?"  
"What?"  
"In the note, what we're you going to say?"  
Yuffie looked down at the crumpled paper in her hand. Was this what this was about? Had he been so distant just because of this? No. . . things had been going sour much longer than that.  
"What does it matter?" He rounded on her, blue eyes flashing.  
"I have a right to know, don't I?! Was I even going to get a note this time, Yuff?"  
"Damn it Reno you are not going to try and guilt trip me! You've been giving shit forever! I can't remember the last time you were good to me. What makes you think you're even worth the fucking paper?"  
  
***  
  
Reno looked at her, watching her seethe. God, he didn't want her mad at him. He hated this but what was he supposed to do? He didn't know what to say. What can you say, when you walk in on your girlfriend packing to leave? The way he was going though, he might as well push her out the door. She might even be better off without him.  
"You're right."  
  
***  
  
Yuffie started. Reno never gave in in a fight. They had had some memorable screaming matches that she was proud of. This wasn't her Reno at all. She walked away from him for a moment before turning again.  
"No, I'm not."  
"What?"  
Yuffie was quiet for a long time before answering.  
"I should have left a note but after that first one I couldn't do it again. I debated about it for so long before finding the words I wanted but, by then, I had lost my nerve."  
She paused, waiting for Reno's reaction but he was stone still.  
"I still remember what it was going to say, isn't that funny? 'Reno, I love you but I just can't do this anymore. I keep on waiting for things to change but I think I know now that they never will. Every day I watch you grow a little bit colder. I think I have to leave before I go cold too.'"  
She looked at Reno, really looked at him, for the first time in ages. His normally bright eyes were dull. He stood hunched over, his normal charismatic air absolutely gone. He looked dead. Not dead in the literal sense, but dead in every way that mattered. He looked empty. That was it; he was empty. Hollow. How long had this been going on, Yuffie wondered. How long had it taken for Reno to fade to this? It had happened so slowly that Yuffie hadn't been able to mark the change until now, at the very end. She had been so centred on the way that he treated her that. . . no, there was something else. Yuffie walked past Reno into in the living room and sat down in their chair.  
"What are you doing?" he asked.  
She really smiled at him then, her deep, mischievous smile, the one that he had always said he loved, but he wouldn't smile back. Her smile faded but she answered simply.  
"I'm not going anywhere."  
Yuffie gestured for him to come sit with her and, to her immense surprise, he had a seat in the chair opposite of her. He didn't look at her though; he just kept his eyes downcast. Yuffie sighed inwardly. Was this even worth it? She watched Reno, looking for some trace of the man that she had fallen in love with, but if it was there, Yuffie couldn't see it. There was something wrong here, something that she couldn't see, and Reno certainly wasn't making it easy for her to figure it out. It might be hopeless. Still, looking at him, Yuffie couldn't bring herself to leave him. He needed her right now, even though she didn't understand why, and she didn't want to leave him. If she was ready to admit it to herself, she needed him too. She wanted her Reno back. She wanted the man that she loved back. Reno, with his mercurial moods, and flashing temper, with his suave demeanour, and cocky attitude. Where had he gone?  
  
***  
  
Reno felt Yuffie watching him but he couldn't bring himself to look at her. He knew what she was waiting for and he couldn't bring himself to give it to her. She wanted explanations, she wanted answers, but Reno didn't think that he had them. Looking at her, he felt the feeling come again. He tried to fight it down but failed. He felt his pulse race. His hands were shaking. He gripped the arms of the chair to try and make them stop. His mouth was dry. He clenched his teeth and tried to force the feeling away but it wouldn't let him go. He closed his eyes, willing it to go away, but it was too strong. It was just too strong.  
  
***  
  
Yuffie watched Reno fighting something she couldn't see. Afraid for him, she jumped out of her chair and rushed across the floor to reach her. She fell down beside him and grabbed his hand.  
"For the love of God Reno, what is it?"  
He opened his eyes and looked down into hers. She could feel his hand shaking in hers. With his free hand, he reached forward and cupped her face. She nuzzled against his palm, revelling in the contact. It had been so long. His hand trembled against her skin. Suddenly, Reno jerked away and dropped his hand. Yuffie felt her eyes burning. She lowered her head to her hands, still cupped over his, and tried not to cry.  
  
***  
  
Reno felt something wet slide down his hand. He snapped back to Yuffie, amazed. He had never seen her cry. He didn't think that she ever had. For a moment, all he could do was stare at her. Her tiny form lay hunched over, her black hair sprayed out around her. She wasn't making a noise, hardly even moving, but she was crying. Why do we always hurt the ones we love the most? Reno slid down out of his chair onto the floor beside Yuffie. She looked up at him, her face streaked with tears. She leapt forward and clutched him, crying convulsively. Reno buried his face in her hair, holding her tightly.  
Reno held Yuffie's shaking form and felt himself trembling. He wasn't crying though. . . he was petrified. He had never been more frightened in his life. It had snuck up on him ages ago and it had been building all this time. His entire body was quivering with fear and he held her closer, begging her not to leave him.  
"Oh God Reno. . . please." Yuffie gasped as she sobbed. "Please. . . just. . . tell. . . me. Please."  
Her sobs took on a more frantic sound and he crushed her against him. He didn't want to hurt her anymore. God help him, he didn't want to.  
"Yuffie." Reno's voice was hoarse because his throat was so dry. He whispered her name again, close to her ear. He felt her shaking lessen, her sobs growing less frantic. He whispered her name again and again. It was all he could say. His heart was pounding in his chest and he held her just a little bit tighter, afraid to let go.  
Yuffie finally stopped crying. He lessened his hold on her. She raised her head and looked up at him. Reno bent forward and kissed her, hard. He kissed her the way he hadn't been able to for weeks now. He felt her melt into him, felt himself fade into her. When they broke apart, Yuffie leaned forward and rested her head against his shoulder again, her strength gone. A few more tears leaked out from her eyes.  
"Yuffie, I love you." Reno whispered gratingly to her. He felt more than heard her sigh.  
"Then why. . .?" She didn't need to finish that sentence. Reno knew what she wanted to hear. Why, why, why? How to make her understand? Would she even believe him? Well, he had to try.  
"Yuff. . . when I'm with you, and everything's all right, I can't help but wait for you to disappear."  
She looked up at him and rubbed some of the tears from her eyes.  
"Reno. . ." He got up and walked a few steps away before turning to face her again.  
"When I was a kid, oh, I don't know, about 4 or 5, I had a little toy noisemaker. It was a cheap, plastic thing, the kind you find in cereal boxes and stuff. I didn't really care; I loved that stupid thing. I'd take it everywhere with me. Then, one day, some kid who was bigger and meaner than I was jumped me and took it. He didn't even keep it, just broke it and left me the pieces."  
Yuffie was starting to understand his point and wanted to talk but he forestalled her.  
"Nothing's ever been right for me Yuff. And the second it starts to turn good. . ." Yuffie stood up and walked over to Reno. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her head against his chest. Reno continued, almost in a whisper.  
"Ever since I met you, I've been waiting for you to leave me. I knew it was going to happen. It was like having a gun to my head, waiting for the trigger to go."  
"Reno," Yuffie said, looking up at him. "I'm not going to leave."  
"I want to believe you. . ."  
"Then do it Turkey!" Yuffie's voice turning mock stern. Suddenly serious again, she continued.  
"I love you Reno and I won't ever, ever leave you. You'll have to kill me first." A ghost of a smile crossed her face. Reno smiled and bent forward to kiss her. Afterwards, he spun around, tugging her towards the door.  
"Come on!" he said.  
"Where are we going?" Yuffie cried.  
"I'm gonna take you out. How does the Blue Garden sound?"  
Yuffie gasped. That was her favourite spot. Reno threw open the door flamboyantly and waited for her at the threshold. Laughing, Yuffie moved to follow him and then stopped, her grin growing wider.  
"You know. . ." she drawled. "I was kind of hoping we could stay in."  
Laughing quietly, Reno bent forward and kissed her again. He kicked the door shut behind him.  
  
Reno ran an absent finger across the side of Yuffie's face. She was smiling faintly in her sleep. He kissed her lightly on the forehead before getting out of bed. He retrieved his pants from the floor and headed over to the small desk they had in their bedroom. There he sat, looking at the small, unobtrusive box in front of him. He rustled through the papers, sorting them. The useless notes he threw out and the important ones he made into a pile on the desk. He'd smile slightly as he came across a noteworthy paper, remembering the moment, before he added it to the pile. At the end, there was only one paper left it the box. He was only half surprised to find that it was the old half finished note. Reno held it in his hands, looking for a trace of the old fear, only to find that it was completely gone. He felt more whole in that moment than he had in weeks. Smiling, he threw the all ready crumpled paper into the trash bin. He looked at the now empty box and considered it a moment before putting the important papers back into it. Still smiling, he left it on the desk, its lid slightly ajar. 


End file.
